wtf

I am having one of those days where I must be cursed or something. I'm being a huge klutz, even more so than usual. First I spilled more than half of the lentil soup that I brought in for lunch. I ate what I had left and am waiting to see if I will be starving in an hour. I spilled it while trying to put it into the microwave, which sits on a ledge above the sink in the pantry. So I guess I was lucky that majority of the spillage went into the sink and not on my head, and cleaning it up wasn't horrifying. That is, until I turned on the hot water to rinse out the sink and burned my freakin hand. Aren't there supposed to be temperature regulators on taps to prevent that shit? Shortly after that lovely incident, I closed my right index finger in a desk drawer. I have soup on my sleeve. I need to go home and get in bed immediately, before I can inflict any further damage on myself and others.

UPDATE: Oh it got worse. On my way home I managed to inhale/swallow some sort of bug. The worst part is that I swear it felt like the bug was still alive but stuck to the back of my throat and struggling to break free. For a few seconds I was gagging and coughing and wondering if there was some way to get it out and avoid swallowing it. After a while I realized that there was no way to get it out and that I had to just swallow if I wanted it to stop tickling and gagging me. I could still feel something in the back of my throat until I got home and guzzled about a gallon of water.

I followed this up by splashing sludgy coffee all over my shirt and the kitchen wall while doing the dishes. I'm going to bed right now.